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Surrogacy Chronicles - Just a Bump in the Road

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    It's taken me some time to really sit and write the words to express and explain the journey my life took us this last year. Sometimes it's hard to put pen to paper and write those feelings down. Finally, I have done it. I've done it more for myself, but I also want to share my journey.      In March 2023, Tammy and I went to NYC for my first transfer for my surrogacy. It was a truly an amazing weekend with my wife, a much needed one for sure. No kids and the city to explore. We really took time for us, as well as, getting to finally meet our Intended Parents.  Tammy focusing very hard on giving me the first of many shots.       The month prior to this trip, I had been preparing my body for this moment. With all the shots, meds and fun hormonal side effects (sorry Tammy), we were excited to get to this point and I was mentally prepared for our first transfer. It had been almost a year since we started on this journey, and we were ready to see it all come to light.     

Surrogacy Chronicals - The Email

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       Who would have thought that a single email would change the course of our lives. I am a true believer in signs, symbols and manifesting. I kind of have to be given all my metaphysical abilities! Here is how my manifestation worked: In April of 2022, I was feeling like something was missing from my life. I wanted to feel more abundance, happiness and money (not that money matters but it helps to make things in life go a little smoother). What do I always do when I need something more, I manifest it. I do full moon and new moon water. I eat sleep and breath the manifestation so that it consumes what I would like from the universe. So, I did just that. Less than a month later, I get an email and it went something like this: Hi Danielle,   I hope you are doing well. You had applied to be a surrogate a few years ago and we were wondering if you had an interest in revisiting? If so, we would love for you to reapply. This email came out of the blue. There was no contact with the a

The Beginning - Why Do I Want to be a Surrogate

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            Since announcing to all my friends and family that I am going to be a surrogate, the questions have come flooding in. This is to be expected because most people "know" of someone who did this as well. They may not know their whole story or their reasoning behind it because may be that person didn't enjoy being an open book. Me on the other hand, I'm the opposite. I want to create an awareness around surrogates and remove that taboo talk about infertility. Infertility in its own is a very hard subject for so many couples. You don't know you are infertility till you try or if you are told ahead of time. For most people, it is the trying that brings out the idea that you may not be able to carry a child, or you will have to go through some sort of infertility process. I talk about this because I was one of those people that didn't know until we started trying. Yeah, I know I have a female partner, but I thought, heck, why can't I get pregnant.

Celebrate

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As you get older, you don't think much about birthdays and really celebrating them. It's the big milestones that mean something but even then you keep it low key! Here's how it usually goes: When you are a child your birthdays are usually big. Presents, friends, family, big parties and stuff you never usually remember. Your parents go crazy for you and celebrate the day you were brought into their lives. You have plenty of photos to remember those birthdays you have forgotten! Like the one up top! When you are in your 20s, it's all about a month long celebration or an epic weekend. You go all out and travel somewhere or hang with your friends every waking moment. Don't work on your birthday because that's not fair, right?! Get trashed and do things you don't remember doing. Those were the days!! Then in your 30s you bring it down a notch (ok maybe a few notches). You either have a 1 day celebration or just a great weekend with family and friends!

Take a Day Off

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All my life I've been an open book. I also believe I have a hidden sign on my head that says "Share your feelings with me" or "tell me your story". This has brought on a lot of interesting conversations with strangers, acquaintances and even some amazing friends. It is something that I enjoy. I get to find out about people, they open up to me! As much as some people would love to hear these stories, I will keep them to myself and enjoy them! The conversations are something I love to share but I will never revile the person. The other day I was having a conversation with someone about days off. I was shocked to find out that he meditates. Let me rewind a little and tell you how the convo came about. He saw that on my calendar it said Day off. He joked and said "that's something I don't see on my Calendar." So I asked "Why not"? He stated that his life is too busy and he never really gets time to himself. He said that his therapist

Be Your Child's Best Friend

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Oh, let's talk about it folks. The thing we have heard often or even said ourselves. I am not my child's BF. But why? I feel like we should be. I mean why wouldn't you want to be your child's best friend. Can you imagine having that good of a relationship with your child? I can and that's why I'm sticking to my words on this one! I get it! We want to be the strong arm. We want them to take us seriously and to know we mean business! But why can't we be their best friend? Now don't get me wrong before Harper was born, the thought of taking care of these little humans was more about being their parent then their friends. The more I walk through life with them I'm beginning to realize that I will always be their BF. Now take a minute and think about who your best friend is. How have they helped you in life? Why are they your BF? For me I have a few that I will go through the rest of my life with and here's how they affected me in all the righ

To Future Harper

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Before Harper was born, I started a journal for him. I believe I got up to his 1st Birthday before I got too busy with him and life, so I just stopped writing in it. It was something that I intended to pass down to him when he got older. My goal was to record important milestones in his life and maybe some parenting assistance for his (possible) future children. I'm sad that I've stopped writing in it but this blog, I feel, is helping with that! I wrote an entry one day, in my phone on my way to pick him up from school. I never did anything with it but kept it in my phone. Well here it goes: I haven't written in this journal in quite some time and it's an awful coincidence that I decided today would be the right day to write to you. Today was one of those really tough days. One of those days that you question how you are parenting your child. Here's why I was questioning my parenting. Today started off great, oh we had a little temper tantrum at first